i only wear white when it rains

because blogging is cheaper than therapy

what’s annoying me this week (and why i may need midol pms)

with one comment

  • The people who swear off caffeine because they are “naturally hyper,” but then later admit to being on Ritalin and amphetamine-like appetite suppressants.
  • Jeggings
  • Anyone replying to a text with “Teehee.”
  • The Starbucks customers who after 10 minutes of waiting in line, say, “Ummmmmm…” followed by a long pause when asked for their order.
  • My mother’s electrician who made me feel like an imbecile for not knowing the difference between xenon and halogen undercabinet lighting, but then proceeded to walk into her sliding glass door.
  • Laser hair removal machines who discriminate against fair-haired women, cursing me with blonde fur forever while my black-haired, ape-like friends become hairless.
  • The mall kiosk people who commit borderline assault with flat irons, fairy wings and dead sea salts when I just want to cash in my Gymbucks. Can’t I file a restraining order?
  • My ass in these yoga pants.
  • Anyone who is cold. All. The. Time.
  • Sun Chips bags. Apparently being “100% compostable” means they are loud enough to be 100% annoying.
  • Use of the word “Jeggings.”

Written by I only Wear White When it Rains

January 20, 2011 at 11:44 am

One Response

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  1. A client of mine told me about this blog and told me to check it out. So, I checked it out. VERY amusing, I must say. Especially this one. Imagine my list being a private “in-home” fitness trainer! Oh, my! I feel like I’m a dad most days, urging my kids to listen and pay attention. I sometimes even call them by their kids’ names to make them aware of their actions. Ha. Def a fun job that requires infinite patience.(Surely being a parent as well) Looking forward to father-hood…Suppose I need a lady friend first. Best get on that. Keep it up. Very witty and very amusing.

    Tom

    February 15, 2011 at 5:53 pm


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